Anger & Forgiveness
In this situation, for so many legitimate reasons, you have a right to be angry. The anger that is happening in this situation is righteous anger because it is response to sin. This is not hot-headed anger over a petty wrong. Things have gone wrong. Things are going wrong. You have been hurt. You are in pain. Do not shove your anger, hurt or pain to the side and pretend everything is okay. That is not a recipe for healing.
The Lord will bring beauty for ashes. He will heal your heart. This is His promise to us. I want to encourage you to take it slow though. Don't be afraid to look your anger or pain in the face and work through it little by little, but do it with Him. Some of you may need to go through a period of expressing your anger to God. Whether it's anger at the situation or even anger at God, it's okay. He loves you.
There will be emotions and memories that come up that will be tempting to brush away and ignore. As things surface, you are not alone. The Lord is with you on the journey.
You may feel shame, rage, hopelessness or confusion. You may feel overwhelmed or discouraged. All of these emotions are okay. It is a journey, one that cannot be rushed. The most important thing to remember is that you are not alone on the journey. We were made for connection – connection with the Lord and with others. The road is not always easy, but He is with us and it is worth it to walk through the pain.
And in that place, keep your heart soft. "In your anger, do not sin," Ephesians 4:26. Don't allow pain to harden your heart. In the areas you can forgive, forgive. Don't rush this process. Let Him work on your heart, and little by little, He will bring wholeness.
And when you can't keep processing pain, it's okay to take a break. Not everything is going to get healed in a day, and even in the process of seeing the hard, gut-wrenching truth of what is actually going on at MSC, He is holding our hands and He knows just how much we can handle. It's okay to take a break. He does have joy for you in this journey. There is hope. It is not all dark. He is bringing freedom, and that freedom is hard-fought, but it's also freedom. Thank you, Jesus! It's going to be okay. Let Him lead you. Trust Him. You only have to do the next thing.
Don't grieve God. Don't break His heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for Himself. Don't take such a gift for granted. Make a clean break with all cutting, back-biting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive on another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you. - Ephesians 4:30-32 MSG